It’s that time again.  Every other year or so, I get back to that scary little area between “normal” and “overweight”.  I am short only .2 points from being overweight.  Some people’s immediate response to this is, “If you’re overweight then what am I?!”  Well…the answer is that you’re probably also overweight.  Duh.  It’s not my fault.  I didn’t make the rules.  Usually, I weigh myself weekly.  If I’ve gained a few I try to eat right for a few weeks and go back to where I was, but this year.  Oh man, ya’ll.  This year, I just walk right by that scale on my way to a bubble bath thinking, “I’ll check on that later.  I don’t have time.”

STOP.  Everything you just read was written about three weeks ago.  I was going to joke about how I looked as pregnant as my BFF, Maggie, and literally the same night I was writing about this, Maggie’s water broke prematurely.  If you want to read that post, it’s the one before this one.  Update on Rowan: she’s still doing as well as she can and she still needs lots of prayers.

So, let me catch you up on where I was going with this whole “I’m right on the line” thing.  Three weeks ago, I got back from a family vacation where I ate an entire container of onion dip every day.  I’m not joking.  Ask my family.   It was the best.  However, when you’re elbow deep in onion dip, you can’t help but think, “this probably isn’t the best decision.”  I decided while I was on vacay that when I came back I was going to make a change.

Now, this isn’t one of those “I’M CHANGING MY LIFE AND BECOMING AWESOME.” posts.  While I plan on actually weighing myself weekly once I lose this weight and maintaining the “five pound rule” (which I spoke of above), I also plan on enjoying things like onion dip and m and ms on special occasions, like vacay. Or a long day.  Or a Monday.  I can’t be one of those people who eats nothing but health food and competitively exercises.  That is not something that makes me happy.  What does make me happy is knowing I’m going to fit in my same size 8 jeans I’ve been wearing since high school, and that I can wear a fitted tee without the dreaded muffin top.

So, I did what I said I was going to do and I’ve been eating healthy and exercising (5 days a week) for three weeks now.  I’m already down NINE POUNDS.  I’m not looking for a pat on the back when I type those words in all caps.  I say NINE POUNDS because it’s pathetic that it took me a year to decide to lose them.  It only took me three weeks.  Why didn’t I just do this when I only had five pounds to lose?!  I haven’t been starving myself and I haven’t even really been counting calories.  I’ve just been choosing healthy things instead of unhealthy ones and eating when I’m hungry.  I kicked my nightly M and M habit and I get on the elliptical for 30 minutes, five days a week.  That’s it.  It’s so freakin simple.

So, I guess I’m hoping to motivate someone else, as my family has motivated me, to get off your butt and work out for just 30 minutes five days a week.  Avoid fried foods and sweets.  Quit drinking soda.  I am probably the laziest, most undisciplined person I know and I did it anyway, so I KNOW you can.  When you’re done, you can follow my probably-really-bad-for-you-but-totally-works diet plan.  I call it the “five pound rule”, and I used to follow it religiously until  life got busy.

Weigh yourself weekly.  If you gain five pounds, pay really close attention to what you eat and exercise until you get it off.  Then, start over.  It’s so easy and I’m kicking myself for being so lazy I couldn’t even step on a scale once a week.

Nine pounds down, fifteen to go.  Who’s with me?!  Bueller?  Bueller?