Author: themunchkinnugget

Everybody’s Ugly To Somebody

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I started writing this blog post over two months ago.  I wasn’t exactly sure what the plan was.  I was inspired to write it because my friend Lenneia posted this beautiful photo collage of yours truly when I was managing a Go-Pro for a white water rafting story that I was lucky enough to participate in:

selfie

Okay, so it isn’t the most flattering of collages.  In fact, Lenneia even had the courtesy to ask me if it was okay that she posted it and offered to remove it.  Of course, I didn’t mind a bit.  I love funny things, and this was hilarious.  I know I’m a fairly attractive person.  I know I have the ability to take cute pictures.  Who cares if the bottom right photo looks like my long lost twin brother?

This reminded me of people I know who have seriously gotten upset with me for posting an unflattering photo of them.  It’s happened more than once, and each time I hadn’t even noticed. Continue reading →

What If God Snatched You Up Into Heaven Right Now?

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So, I’m reading a little Genesis this afternoon and it’s all, “This dude fathered this guy and this man made this baby who had more babies….”  and  all the sudden this man named Enoch is snatched.  Into Heaven.  Because God and him and like total BFFs.  WHAT?!  Amongst a bunch of boring who-fathered-who hoopla, Enoch disappears.  Here are the verses: Continue reading →

The KKK Are People Too

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I’ve been avoiding reading about the Confederate flag controversies lately.   Between that, the Marines in Chattanooga, ISIS, and Planned Parenthood, I just need a break.  When my husband told me about the KKK hiding in a parking garage in South Carolina, however,  I had to look it up.  I’m so glad I did.  It was a moment of entertainment amongst a lot of serious crap piles.  Click HERE to watch the video.

Have you ever seen Django, Unchained?  It was seriously incredible.  I am a huge Tarentino fan, but my mother would tell you he is THE WORST.  Anyway, there is a scene in the movie that immediately came to mind when I saw the KKK hiding in a parking garage.  The language is so foul that I cannot talk myself into posting a link here, but you can look it up if you so desire.  As they prepare for a raid, a group of klansmen stop on their horses to discuss their plans and end up getting in an argument over whether or not they were going to wear bags over their heads or not.  Although it was in a negative light, it kind of humanizes members of the KKK.  It reminds the viewer that they probably had conversations and disputes within the clan about how hard one member’s wife worked on making their pillowcase head ware or how difficult it is to see out of them.  I did find another funny and clean link HERE that makes me wonder what in the world the KKK in this century actually does discuss in their little meetings.  Do they have coffee and doughnuts?  Potluck dinners?  Do they get together for family picnics and fall festivals-and what were the members of the KKK saying to each other as police protected them in the parking garage in South Carolina? Continue reading →

Everything’s Up To Date In Kansas City

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Today was crazy.  I ran pretty much every errand on my list.  Sent cards.  Went to bank.  Purchased and wrapped wedding gifts.  Got ten dollar Target gift card for buying two boxes of diapers.  (Woot!) Bought Maya Angelou stamps. (Double woot!)  As Jack and I were exiting our car at Target, the sky fell upon us and soaked us completely.  It was almost nice, as the air conditioned building helped us survive the record breaking heat that has kept us from going anywhere outdoors this week.  The best part of my day may have been when my dog puked up hamburger grease on the carpet.  Or maybe it was a few hours later when she did it again, but I didn’t notice-until my baby slipped in it-requiring an immediate tiny human rinse off/carpet cleaning combo.  Actually, it might even be about an hour ago, when my husband woke me up in the middle of the night to find his car keys that I lost.  It’s hard to believe that only a few days ago, we were living it up in Kansas City.  Already, we are back to the real world of annoying my husband and bathing my puke covered toddler. Continue reading →

The Christian Bully

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Before I begin, I would like to say to my fellow bloggers that every once in a while it is really nice to go back to old school pen and paper.  It gives a writer more time to think before writing something she may regret sharing.  How perfect that I find myself without a laptop when wanting to get out my feelings on such a sensitive topic.  As I’m sure any person with a television is aware, gay marriage is now legal in all fifty states of America.  This has disheartened many and has fulfilled dreams that many others never thought possible.  My opinion on the matter is really not what this post is about, but in case you are wondering, I think it is certainly constitutional.   Continue reading →

How I Almost Hit A Child With My Car And Why It Made Me So Mad

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Tonight, as I was driving to my local grocery store to buy TWO GALLONS OF MILK FOR A DOLLAR (seriously!), a group of pre-teens on their bikes had taken over my street.  They were literally in the middle of and on the both sides of the road-and they did not give a poo that I was driving steadily towards them.  I gave them my classic “What the heck is wrong with you?!” look as one child gave me the finger and another angrily proclaimed, “Something-something-something-lady!” while running towards my car like it had insulted his mother. I don’t know what he thought he was going to do.  I don’t know if he knew what he thought he was going to do, but dammit, he was ready to do it. Continue reading →

Cutting Sandwiches

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Every day, as I prepare a meal for my one year old, I think of my dad.  Especially when I’m cutting his sandwiches into perfect little squares so his squishy fingers can shove bite-sized pieces into his mouth.  It reminds me of the meals my dad used to make me.  Peanut butter and jelly was my fav.  Four perfect squares, hold the crust.  Cheese toast was second best.  These bits were even smaller.  Tiny individual toasts with melted cheddar.  Another frequent request was “pink pink”, my word for scrambled eggs.  Dad isn’t quite sure where that came from, but we think I called it that because the eggs came in a pink carton.  I didn’t call scrambled eggs anything, but “pink pink” until I was embarrassingly old. When I am cutting Jack’s sandwiches up for him, I think of my dad and all the fun we had growing up.  All the weird and unique things I did with just my dad and no one else.  Here are just a few of the things that I flashback to while cutting sandwiches: Continue reading →

Pregnant And Afraid: What You Need To Know

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After recently listening to a girl who was pregnant with her first child share her anxiety about her upcoming childbirth, I was inspired to quickly jot down important things I learned from my own experience.  While I read the books and took the classes, there were still some things I didn’t think about until after I checked in.  Also, several of the things I was anxious about turned out to be quite trivial in hindsight. Continue reading →

Suck It Up, Buttercup: One Of The Many Times I Embarrassed My Mother

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It was my first job ever.  I didn’t even apply for it.  A few days before my first day of high school, I was informed of my new position at Eldercare Pharmacy.  I was to work there after school until 5:30pm.  I was excited.  I’m not sure why.  We hadn’t even discussed that I would get a job in high school.  I guess my parents just thought I should.  Alright, then.

As usual, I hadn’t eaten a thing.  I never woke up in time to eat anything, and I refused to eat the nastiness they served for lunch at school.  No, not even the rubbery pizza with plastic cheese could tempt my palate.  Someone once pointed out to me that I could pack a lunch.  What?  Like, plan ahead?  When?  The night before?  Are you kidding me?  Nope.  Another option would have been bringing money to school for the vending machine, but I didn’t have a job, yet, so…. Continue reading →