A few weeks ago, she called me.  “Is your dad okay?!” she asked in her WHAT THE HELL voice.  I was confused.  “Yes.  I think so.  I haven’t talked to him today, but I think he’s okay. I don’t understand.”  Explaining further, Mom had been asked by several people how Dad is “dealing” with her upcoming nuptials.  A few others had asked if she was inviting her ex-husband to the wedding.  “That’s funny, Mom!  I’ve been asked, too.”

I had.  People I really don’t even know that well had asked me in sympathetic voices, “How’s your Dad doing with your mom getting remarried?”  First of all, if he were miserable, I definitely wouldn’t tell you that, but the thing is-he isn’t.  Secondly, the conversation was never started with “Congratulations!  I’m glad your mom is happy.” I always awkwardly explain that Dad is quite happy.  He’s happy with his life, and he’s happy for my mom.   If you’re reading this and thinking “Oh, God.  I was the one she’s talking about.”  you are one of many, and I’m not mad at you.  I just thought maybe you’d like to read the way your words sound from our perspective in case you find yourself in a similar situation in the future. Continue reading →